Wednesday, April 11, 2007

misc. assortedness

in-the-rain

purple

The first two photos (above) are new, and the next two are old. Hmm. I'm not sure I detect a lot of improvement over the last year. I guess there's always next year, unless I get sick of flower photos by then.

iris

red

And now for something completely different. I haven't done one of these assorted-stuff-from-the-interwebs posts for a while, and there may be a good reason for that. But it escapes me at the moment, so here's a new one. I'm kind of out of practice with these, though, so if it's something less than a broad spectrum of uniformly fascinating items, well... At least it didn't cost you anything, other than those few seconds of your life that you spent here that you'll never get back. Sorry about that.

Spring Beer & Wine Festival 2007

Spring Beer & Wine Festival 2007

On Saturday, we dropped by the Spring Beer & Wine Festival over at the Convention Center. This has always been one of my favorite beery events; it's indoors, it's always held the weekend of Easter, the selection's usually pretty good, and you're more likely to encounter the actual brewers than at most events of this kind. Beerwise, this year wasn't the best SBWF ever, but we had a good time as always.

Spring Beer & Wine Festival 2007

Some impressions:
  • A lot of breweries brought their usual fare you can find at the grocery store. Which is not why we go to these things. We generally tried to avoid beers we could get elsewhere, even beers we otherwise enjoy.

  • I didn't do any detailed tasting notes this time around. I had the Blackberry along and everything, but it just sort of felt like that would take me beyond mere dork territory into full-bore twitdom. Yes, do I realize I've done precisely that at least once before. But maybe I'm starting to develop social skills or something. I'm not sure.

  • I'm kind of surprised the local beerblogosphere (and there's got to be a better word than that ) hasn't had much to say about it. So far I've run across just two mentions of the festival, and the first is by someone who wasn't able to go.

  • My overall favorite of the festival was the Bitter Bitch IPA (128 IBU, 9% ABV), from Astoria Brewing out in (you guessed it) Astoria. Mmmmm.... I was far from alone in this. I got there early and tried it before the huge line formed. Later when we walked by, the line was starting to interfere with the cooking demo stage. If you were stuck in that line, don't blame me. I told nobody. Ok, I let my wife try it. And I ran across a couple of coworkers late in the day and I told them, but the line was already in full swing at that point. The line was someone else's fault, basically is what I'm getting at here.

  • I always run into coworkers at these things. I can never decide whether that's a good thing or not.

  • The one line we did get stuck in was the line to get in. Seems that word got out about free admission before 2pm. So we were in line for maybe 10 minutes, and right behind us there were a couple of guys who were there to party. One spent most of the wait telling the other all about the totally awesome lap dance he had the other night. Guys: This sort of thing falls firmly into the Too Much Sharing Department. Thanks.

  • While I'm your classic Northwest IPA dork, my wife's more of a red fan. Hairsplitting arguments about whether "red" is a legitimate beer style would be unwelcome in her presence. Her favorite was Red Zone, from Hazel Dell Brewing up in the 'Couve. Full Sail's seasonal red was a close second. She's usually not a big Full Sail fan, so this was kind of a surprise. She didn't like the red from Pelican quite so much, which was even more of a surprise.

  • We both liked the imperial brown from Walking Man, which they brewed up specially for the festival, bless their beery little hearts. They always give their beers funny names that have something to do with walking, or feet, stuff like that. So they named the brown "Foot Fetish". (giggle) Which still isn't quite as funny as the "Streetwalker Malt Liquor" they did a while back.

  • On a lark, I tried the Huckleberry-n-Honey beer from Lang Creek, a small Montana brewery I'd never heard of before. Way better than I expected. Even my wife liked it, and she usually considers fruit in beer an abomination.

  • One nice thing is that although kids were allowed before 7pm this year, there weren't very many of 'em. Mostly babies in strollers, and that I can understand. If you have a baby in a stroller, you probably need a beer. Why else would they make strollers with cupholders? It all makes perfect sense, really.

  • Lompoc's EZ Taxation ale was really tasty as well. Which reminds me of something important I still need to attend to.... Hey, there's still a few days left, what's the big rush?

  • I was puzzled at first by how many people were walking around munching on bags of Beer Chips, when there was real food to be had just steps away. Then I saw the booth, which was run by a couple of bubbly young women in extremely tight tops. We men really are the simplest of creatures, aren't we?

  • The food's never exactly gourmet at these things. But there were ribs to be had, therefore I was a happy camper. Please note previous comment about being among the simplest of creatures.

Friday, April 06, 2007

photo friday strikes again

kick off yer shoes

Top photo: Sudden warm weather always inspires this sort of thing. Sometime next week she'll snap out of it and wonder where she left her shoes. They were still at the 1st & Oak MAX stop when I saw them. But you probably ought to hurry if you think you'll ever want them back. Or I suppose you could just buy a new pair instead. These may be last year's shoes, for all I know. It's not my area of expertise, I'm afraid.

In case you hadn't figured it out yet, this is yet another photo post. Yep, another one, and even bigger than usual, I'm afraid. It's not all photos of flowers this time though. See, I really am flexible, a little, sort of.

barley_vane

The weathervane on top of the old Henry Weinhard brewery, now part of the Brewery Blocks development. I'd never really looked at it before, but it's pretty great: A stalk of barley, and a brewer's grain shovel (I think).

Did I mention that Portland's Spring Beer & Wine Festival is on this weekend? I think I know what I'll be doing tomorrow. Feel free to attend as well -- just so long as you're not in line ahead of me, I mean.

mexifries_grande

The photo I promised in the previous post: An order of "Mexi-Fries Grande" from Taco Time. Tater tots and bacon. Oh, and cheese, etc. Pure greasy, starchy, fatty ambrosia.

I probably shouldn't have eaten this. Until my toe feels better I can't go to the gym and run and generally be good like I'm supposed to. But at the time it was oh, so tasty.

I understand that the Oaks Bottom Pub over in Sellwood offers a similar delicacy, which they refer to as tot-chos. And the Kells Irish pub downtown has long offered a related item they call "Irish Nachos". Regular potatoes sliced and fried, instead of tater tots, but still entirely adequate for my purposes. And they go surprisingly well with a Guinness or two.

rusting chunks & cherry blossoms

Another shot of our old friend Rusting Chunks No. 5. The glory of springtime doesn't really improve the damn thing very much, does it?

chunks_fountain

More rusting chunks, this time viewed through the fountain of a nearby condo tower. (They (the chunks, I mean (of course)) are just to the right of the pillar, in the background.) You could probably do this in Photoshop just as easily if you knew how, but I don't. I could probably find out if I wanted to, but I'm lazy and it's not important enough. And really it's more fun (IMHO) to see what you can do with a middle-of-the-road vanilla consumer camera rather than invest in an expensive "prosumer" hardware & sofware combo. And besides, "prosumer" is a truly stupid word. If you're going to insist on coining neologisms, you can have the new word be whatever you like, so why pick something that sounds like a greasy part off a diesel engine? Sheesh.

Besides, if you're going to mess around with image manipulation, why waste your time with water effects, when you can insert a rampaging Gamera stomping on the rusting chunks. Now that would be worth seeing. But I don't know how to do that either.

There might be a setting in GIMP to do this stuff, but it beats me where they might've hidden it.

fremont

The Fremont Bridge and its reflection, in a still-undeveloped far corner of the Pearl District.

hydrants

This is where fire hydrants come from. Sort of. This truck was downtown, and the hydrants are probably for the reconstructed transit mall, once they've put the new MAX tracks in.

MAX construction, April '07

Speaking of which, here's a shot of SW 5th Avenue with MAX tracks going in. In the unlikely event you're interested in seeing this for yourself, sorry, it's too late now. They've added the concrete, and now it just looks like normal light rail tracks. So nothing to see here. Move along.

southfork

An authentic commemorative shot glass from the real Southfork(tm), you know, from that TV show. Someone gave this to me, I hasten to add. I haven't been there. The text around the outside rattles off a few key points about the show, beginning with "Texas Oil Power Money Greed Millionaires". Oddly enough, if you buy a shot glass at the White House gift shop, the inscription on the outside says exactly the same thing. Go figure.

If my usual luck holds, the preceding brief comment will reel in a few Dubya-worshiping Bible-thumping Kool-Aid(tm)-drinking wingnuts, and they'll post illiterate, abusive rants in all capital letters, lecturing me all about the imminent Rapture and whatnot, and then I'll have to waste a minute or two deleting the rants, or possibly mocking them. It's always an adventure out here on the interwebs.

sunrise1

A couple of sunrise photos from last month.

sunrise2

Ok, that should about do it. Once again, sorry about all the big photos, dialup user(s)!

Moblog season

So mostly I'm just doing this to look busy. I wandered out of the office to go track down this year's copy of TurboTax, finally, which meant a trip over to the Mac store near Lloyd Center. Which in turn meant a side trip to the mall proper to visit the food court in search of the fabled "Mexi-Fries Grande", basically a plate of tater tots with cheese, salsa, sour cream, green onions, and most importantly... Bacon! But that's a subject for another time, since I can't post photos from the BB here. Did I mention I have an extremely sore big toe? Well, I do, and after all that walking I figured a sore toe was a good reason to grab a beer on the way back to the office. It's a tendon thing, or possibly a ligament, and either way the beer isn't actually medicinal. But still, it seemed like a good idea. So here I am at the downtown Stumptown, and everyone except me has a laptop. Ok, I'm exaggerating, but they're a clear majority. Everyone's so *busy*... So I figured I didn't want to look totally out of place, I mean, everyone else might start to feel insecure and wonder why they're sitting there doing real work (or playing solitaire) when they could be out enjoying the rare sunshine. I have a sore toe, let's keep that in mind, so I have a legitimate excuse. And they don't.

I have this tedious habit of always counting the laptops when I'm in a coffee shop. Right now we're up to 9, which I think ties the record. Stumptown really isn't that big, so 9 means one at every table, and a couple on the sofa in back. Oh wait, there's two on one of the tables, so we're up to 10 now. And 6 are Macs.

The Oregonian had a piece this morning about it being the season to take the laptop out to the park and mooch some of that tasty free WiFi goodness, although they quickly discovered that it's more of a theoretical good idea than an acutal one.

I had a corporate Dell notebook for a while, and I used to use it when I rode MAX. I felt so important... One time a guy offered to trade me a bag of weed for it, so clearly he didn't realize how much the thing cost. It would've had to be a very, very large bag, is what I'm saying. Speaking purely hypothetically, of course.

Ok, now we're up to 11. When the laptops go up to 11, you know things are entirely out of hand. It's just posing, at that point. But hey, I just paid $6 for a Chimay on draft, so what do I know?

Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld

twenty thousand

So visitor #20,000 dropped by earlier this morning. Ok, that's not precisely true; visitor #20,000 dropped by SNR, this blog's nerdy and obsessive sibling, earlier this morning. But I use the same hit counter for both, just to simplify things... well, and because it makes the numbers scroll by a little faster that way, to be honest.

In my most recent metablog (i.e. blogging about blogging) post, I'd just gone back over old posts and attached "labels" to them. Which is a nice feature, but it's had a couple of odd side effects. First, Google went and indexed the resulting label pages, producing the same "junk hit" effect I've seen since they started indexing monthly archive pages. You search for two keywords, and end up on one of my label or archive pages, but one keyword occurs in a post from last month, and the other in an unrelated post a year earlier, and both are way down the page so you'll really have to search to find either. People typically don't bother with that, and I can't blame them. Google owns Blogger, so you'd think they'd have a clue about which pages are worth indexing and which aren't. Oh, well. I probably shouldn't take it personally.

The other odd thing is that when I added all those labels, Blogger sent me a ton of visitors who happened to be using the Next Blog button or otherwise wandering around Blogger's corner of blogospace at the time. I don't know if that was supposed to be my reward for using the new feature, or what. Back in the day, I used to be rather interested in where visitors arrived from, and the pseudorandom nature of how they got here, and I used to post "referrer" lists fairly regulary. Eventually I got bored with that and moved on to even less interesting things. But this time around there was just so much data and it seemed a shame not to do anything with it. It's not quite a statistical sample of the blog universe, but hey. It's the data I have in hand, and here it is. I've weeded out a couple of splogs, but I haven't gone down the list and screened each blog or anything, because that would take a lot of time, and the resulting list wouldn't be very random, would it? So if you see something here that you don't like, well, that's the interwebs for ya. Just deal with it.

So without further ado, here's the list. Three (or so) cheers for pseudorandomness.....

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

...and for today, even more flowers....

obryant_3

I haven't posted for a few days, and I was hoping to post about something a little more serious, instead of yet another post full of pictures of flowers. But more serious means more writing, which means more time, and time is something I have a highly finite amount of. So flowers it is, again. More flowers than usual, even. Sorry about that, dialup user(s)!

The top photo, and a couple of others down the page are from O'Bryant Square, the place a lot of people consider to be downtown Portland's "needle park", although I've never actually seen any needles there. It would be more accurate to call it downtown's empty park, and I blame that on the surrounding area, not the park itself. The highly touted "Three Downtown Parks" plan proposes to rip out the underground parking beneath O'Bryant Square and turn it into some sort of mini nature preserve, which I imagine means giving it the ol' Tanner Springs treatment. But you can do all you like to the place and it'll still be empty of people until the surrounding area sees a little more pedestrian traffic. There was a story a few years ago that someone wanted to build a ritzy condo tower on the surface parking lot just north of the square, but that hasn't happened yet.

vinca + dandelion

Back when I had a yard, it never would've occurred to me to photograph a dandelion as if it was just another kind of flower. Dandelions are the stuff of suburban male nightmares. Dandelions, and thistles, and anything that drops leaves in the fall, and scary teenagers, and the nosy neighbor who runs the homeowners' association, and creepy door-to-door salespeople, and on, and on, and on.

But as I said, now I don't have a yard, and this dandelion is someone else's problem. So I can just take a picture of it and be on my merry way.

pink_azalea

I tend to get myself in trouble when I try to identify flowers, but I'm pretty sure this is an azalea. I'm even more sure it's pink.

I was originally going to do a smaller post that just had a few extreme closeups of flowers like this one, and title it something like "The naughty bits... EXPOSED!!!!". Which I'm sure would get me a lot more page views than the current title. But that just feels like a scam, somehow. Besides, I'm not actually selling banner ads here or anything. It's nice when people drop by and visit this humble, ever so humble, blog, but it doesn't really impact my bottom line either way. So I figure I'll just call it what it really is, and if anyone feels like visiting because of that, hey, that's great. Hi, everyone (if you exist)!

obryant_2

A daffodil, probably, in O'Bryant Square, definitely. More naughty bits.

fern, ankeny park

A fern growing in a brick wall, in Ankeny Park, downtown. When you see a fern growing in a brick wall, it's generally a sign of poor maintenance, so this isn't actually a great thing to see. The wall itself is part of a 1920s-era public toilet, which is a little run-down on the outside, and (I'm told) astonishingly decrepit inside. So this is one of those cases where it's better to stick to extreme closeups.

japanese maple

Japanese maple (I think) in bloom. I didn't realize these had flowers at all until I was walking by and happened to notice these. Not the best photo ever; the damn things just wouldn't hold still for the camera, I'm afraid. Sorry.

44_flowers1

People keep telling me this is a "tulip tree". Maybe they're right, or maybe I'm talking to the wrong people. Either way, even more naughty bits.

obryant_1

O'Bryant Square again. I recently checked the county library's database of old Oregonian stories for news stories about the square, and I was surprised at how little there really was. Apparently this was once a meeting ground for neo-Nazi skinheads, but that was like 20 years ago. Now it's just the occasional office worker eating lunch, or maybe a pigeon or two.

petals

Fallen cherry(?) petals near Rusting Chunks No. 5, in the South Auditorium district.

cherry blossoms, april 4th '07

I have no idea what kind of tree this is. Sorry. Nice flowers, though.

flowers at night

More of the same, but this time at night. This concludes today's fluffy and content-free post. Thanks for playing.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

duck, duck, geese, hummingbird

I'm not really much of a birdwatcher, and I don't take pics of birds very often. But it's springtime, and birds are flying north again, some ending up in unlikely spots:

duck & reflection, lovejoy fountain

duck, lovejoy fountain

A duck in Lovejoy Fountain. I like how it paddles right between the groovy 60's stepstones. The duck probably didn't stay long; there's nothing to eat here, unless it's evolved so it can digest concrete. Which is unlikely. I hope.

Just a couple of months ago, I was photographing snowboarders in almost exactly the same spot. Spring is great, isn't it?

Ducks, Tanner Springs

More ducks, this time in the murky pond in ultra-upscale Tanner Springs Park. This is basically the first animal life I've seen in this supposedly precious and incredibly delicate ecosystem. Which raises an obvious question: There are big signs all over the place scolding you that dogs are Uber-Verboten in the park. Seems that if a dog does its business here, it sets off a catastrophic park-wide chain reaction, leading to total ecological collapse. So what if a duck does its business here? It's basically the same stuff, and they might be putting it directly into the water. If we have a wetland that's so fragile it can't even support the presence of a couple of waterfowl, that's really not something we ought to pride ourselves on, is it? Sounds like poor design to me.

waterfront geese

Some Canada geese in Waterfront Park. This was actually taken back in late October, during the previous migration. This is mostly here to make the title work. Basically I realized I had a couple of recent pictures of ducks, figured I might as well post them, and then tried to think of a clever title. I had a couple of older pics of geese lying around, so I figured, what the heck. I don't think I've posted this one yet, but I could be wrong. At least geese are migratory, except when they aren't.

hummingbird

And now we've veered completely off the original topic. This is one of the Anna's hummingbirds that lives in our neighborhood year-round. Someone has a feeder. Probably lots of people have feeders.

I only know what kind of hummingbird this is because my wife told me. This photo won a bet between her and a friend of ours. And there was booze for all. Yay, hummingbirds! Yay, booze!

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

...wherein stuff finally gets labelled...

The more I use New Blogger, the more I think it's not so bad after all. Today I started playing around with the Labels feature, which is their implementation of what everyone else calls "tags". It handles the rel=tag thing, so (hopefully) I don't have to tag posts manually for Technorati anymore. I usually don't bother with that, it's just too much of a hassle. Whether that actually works or not, at least it's nice to finally be able to assign posts to categories. I spent a couple of hours earlier today sorting through old posts and trying to put at least one tag, er, label on each. I'm not quite done with that yet, since I've got about 15 months and 400-some posts to deal with, but I've noticed some interesting trends. Rougly one post in four is tagged "photos", and since I didn't know how to post photos the first few months of this blog, and not every post with photos is tagged "photos", the recent average has got to be a bit higher.

I actually started looking at the label feature because I wanted to do a roundup of my parks posts, which is sort of a niche I've fallen into over time. It's kind of a strange little niche, and it wasn't exactly intentional, but the posts have generally turned out well (so I've thought), and have been popular (by my standards), so I've kept doing it. I was originally just going to do a post with links to all the older park posts, but Labels solve the general case.

A lot of my early posts were tagged "politics", but these have become increasingly rare over time. It's not that I've stopped caring or paying attention. Far from it. Primarily I felt I didn't get into the whole blog thing just to be another screaming head in a partisan echo chamber. I mean, I think I could be pretty damn good at that if I wanted to, but saying "me too" all the time isn't very rewarding, no matter how well you word it. Besides that, I also realized that writing about politics tends to make me agitated and unhappy, far more than simply reading about the subject would do. Some people, talk radio fans for example, seem to get a thrill out of being angry, but I don't. And it doesn't help that political posts tend to reel in the wingnuts. If they had anything interesting to say, that might not be so bad, but most of the time they just drop by to declare that anyone who won't worship Dubya has to be tortured and killed for Jesus, stupid crap like that. So most of the time I just don't bother. Which is not to say that I won't, it's just that I usually don't.

One odd bit is that during all the label tweakage, Blogger kept sending scores of page views my way, close to a hundred of 'em, I think. I've generally stopped paying attention to the whole referrer-page thing that used to be a staple here, but with that many it becomes another story. I still have some formatting and cleanup to do on the list, and there are bound to be duplicates to weed out, but once I've done that there'll be a nice long list of blogs, pseudo-randomly assembled for your enjoyment. Won't that be delightful?

Monday, March 26, 2007

mondaypix

326flowers1

pearl-weed

326flowers3

blade

holladay

326flowers2

It's Monday, and it's spring, so of course it's time for more plant photos. Enjoy, or whatever.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Stanich Park expedition


View Larger Map

Some photos of Simon G. Stanich Park, a tiny, obscure, and very weird little spot up in the Overlook neighborhood of North Portland. Never heard of it, right? I hadn't until I ran across this post over at alt.portland, which piqued my curiosity:


The [Going St.] Overpass sits in the Si Stanich Park, a tiny square commemorating Simon Stanich, an architect and neighborhood activist. The park, and the stone that commemorates it, have really seen better days. It once housed a park bench, but now only the supports for a park bench, and a lot of trash.

I have a real predilection for the tiny, the obscure, and the weird, and over time I've ended up with a semi-regular series of posts about unknown and forgotten city parks, landmarks, monuments, and such. So once I heard about this place, I had to know more.

A quick search of the interwebs led me to a more detailed post at WalkingPortland, and another mention of the place at Pudgy Indian. But that's about it. The city itself has nothing to say about the place. The closest they've got to it is the mysteriously-named "Mocks Crest Property", which is a few blocks away and clearly a different place. Beyond that, nothing. That settled it. I had to go find the place and see for myself.

(There's a fascinating piece at CafeUnknown about the Overlook area. It doesn't mention the park or the overpass but has a photo of a "nameless park" in the area, several blocks due west of here.)

Updated: I found a couple more photos of the place on Flickr: One of the park itself, and two photos of the footbridge.

Stanich Park is actually quite easy to get to, if you know it's there. If you look at this Google Map, in the lower right-hand corner you'll see the Prescott St. MAX station. So if you get off the Yellow Line train there, and walk a couple of blocks west to Concord Avenue, you'll come to a rather beat-up looking pedestrian overpass over busy Going St.:

stanich-park1

The park itself is lurking right beneath the spiral ramp for the overpass. Just walk past the start of the ramp, back to where you'd expect to find a tiny homeless camp or something, and you're there. Here's a grand panorama of the place, such as it is:

stanich-park2

Yep, this is the whole thing. Lovely, isn't it? At least nobody's going to hassle me for posting tedious photos of flowers from here, because there aren't any. This place literally is "where the sun don't shine".

Here's the grand tour: An irregular-shaped brick plaza the size of a small patio. Some park bench supports, but no park bench -- but really, would you want to sit there? (If you look at the photo in the WalkingPortland piece, the bench was still there just a year ago.) Nearby, a garbage can, and some trash lying around. And finally, the stone marker giving the name of the place. The top photo shows one side of the marker, and here's the other side:

stanich park 4

Wait, what's this? The west-facing side of the marker calls it "Simon G. Stanich Park", and the east side calls it "Si Stanich Square". So which is it? Both? Neither? Maybe the brick part is the square (despite not actually being a square), which is part of the larger park (with the ramps, the scraggly fir tree, the rusty streetlight pole, etc.). But why? Who knows?

The inscription isn't too readable in this photo. It reads: "By City Council resolution 9-3-73 Dedicated 8-1-76". So it was the 70's. Maybe there's a real reason the park seems to have two names, but for now I'll just blame it on the 70's.

The bit on the other side quoting from the Gettysburg Address (...Of the People, By the People, For the People) seems kind of grandiose for this location, but maybe it was a bicentennial thing.

stanich-park5

Here's a closeup of the portrait on this side of the stone. I'd guess this is Mr. Stanich himself, with later embellishments added by various artists.

What the stone doesn't tell us is why the city named this place after him. The WalkingPortland piece speculates he's connected to Stanich's, a popular burger place in NE and SW Portland that's been a local institution for decades. I've never been there myself. I thought about dropping by for a little "research", but I haven't gotten around to it yet. Their classic burger comes topped with a pile of ham and a fried egg, a prospect I regard with no small amount of trepidation. Here's someone's photo of a Stanich burger, so you can make up your own mind. In any case, the connection's purely speculative anyway.

The Multnomah County Library's searchable Oregonian database only goes back to 1988, well after the park was dedicated. Here's an article from May 1990 about a Si Stanich who was then running for a Metro council position. The piece describes him as a 70-year-old retired architect and neighborhood activist. Subsequent articles note that he didn't win the election. And here's his obit, from November 1996. No mention of burgers anywhere, which is kind of a shame. It'd be a good story.

Note the dates: Park dedicated 1976. Deceased 1996. This illustrates one of the lesser-known dangers of naming things after living people. The usual argument is that you shouldn't do this because the honoree can still do something terrible, even though he's been famous and well-regarded for years. Think OJ, or Neil Goldschmidt for example. But the party bestowing the honor can screw up too. Imagine what it must be like: The city holds a big dedication ceremony and names a city park after you. Granted, it's not a very big park, but it's an honor anyway. But soon the city completely forgets about the place and lets it fall into disrepair, while you're still alive. I don't know how Mr. Stanich felt about that, but if I was in that position I'd have to say it would rankle a bit. Ok, a lot. I'd be inclined to drop by regularly and pick up the garbage in "my" park and shoo the drug dealers away and so forth. But that would be wrong on so many levels. Nobody should have to do that.

Something to consider if anyone offers to name something after you. If it was me, I think I'd decline the honor. Especially a place like this. If the naming really was meant as a compliment, it's certainly one of the more backhanded ones I've ever seen.

Updated 3/29/11: Thanks to the library's new Oregonian historical archives, we now have some answers. An August 1, 1976 article about the park's dedication is titled "Street fighter to be honored". It seems Mr. Stanich led neighborhood opposition to the city's plan to widen Going St. from four to six lanes. (It's currently up to 5 lanes). He also helped lobby for the overpass here, which was intended to let neighborhood kids get to school safely. The article goes on to explain that everybody liked the guy, although it still isn't clear why he got a park and a one ton rock with his face on it, an honor rarely bestowed on neighborhood activists who fight city hall. Especially ones who fight city hall and win. The article includes a photo of Mr. Stanich in front of his namesake park.

A previous mention, on September 4, 1975, merely says that "In other business, the council agreed to name an area on the south side of N Going Street at Concord Avenue 'Si Stanich Square'".

An April 19, 1974 article covers the neighborhood petition against the street widening, for a little more background on that effort.

Another interesting and unrelated mention of Mr. Stanich: A November 16, 1960 article mentions him in passing in connection with a Portland Art Museum architectural exhibition titled "Form Givers At Mid-Century", with a photo of several men in bow ties posing with a model of New York's Seagram Building. I'm not sure there could be anything more quintessentially 1960 than that, not without adding an atomic monorail or something.

Stanich Park

If you took any upper-division humanities courses in college, say 10-15 years ago, you might recall your instructors had this secret, private, impenetrable language that used the words "signifier" and "signified" a lot. While I'll admit to an imperfect, non-Ph.D. understanding of the lingo, I'd suggest this is a good illustration of the basic notions involved. The monument, the name of the park, the "signifier", is the park. Other than it, there's nothing of significance here, no place, no identity. Nobody would call it a park (or a square) if the sign wasn't here. For all intents and purposes, it really is the park. There's a signifier, and no signified, which is (or was) quite the sign of cultural sophistication, apparently. If you took the sign away, poof, no more park. If you put it somewhere else, that's where the park would be. Mass-produce them in a sweatshop somewhere in China, and then all of the copies are the park. Take a photo of the sign, leave it on your kitchen counter, or put it on the interwebs, and that's the park too. Isn't this fun?

Quite honestly, I always thought the whole thing was just an intellectual parlor trick. Sure, it's interesting. Sure, it's flashy and exciting. But in the end, so what? As a practical matter, all it meant was that clueless boomers with tenure would give you an A+ every time you wrote a paper that mentioned Madonna or MTV. Suckers.

But I digress. It's a fairly decent monument, by modern standards of stonework. Ok, it kinda looks like a headstone, but that's where the money is anymore. In any case, the thing deserves a better setting than this.

stanich-park6

Here's a closeup of the side of the monument. I think this is supposed to tell us who carved it. I can't quite make out the name, though. I think it says "Jim Mounce". I ran across one recent mention of a stonemason by that name, located out on the coast. So that's a possibility.

The other lettering above the name I can't make out at all. I didn't even notice it was there until I got the photo home and looked at it.

stanich-park7

So this is from the middle of the square, looking up through the center of the spiral ramp. Nothing much to say about this, I just sort of liked this photo.

Spiral Ramp, Stanich Park

I feel really sorry for the poor, spindly, light-starved fir tree in the center of the spiral ramp. But perhaps the tree was a really horrible person in a past life, and we're watching bad karma in action. I guess there'd really be no way to prove that, would there?

going_overpass1

Looking north across the Going St. overpass. It's amazing how rusty everything is here. You'd think they'd have taken our climate into account when choosing their materials, but no.

There's something about most pedestrian overpasses that screams "urban blight". The surrounding neighborhoods are perfectly decent and respectable and all that, it's just this bridge that looks dodgy. Not falling-down dodgy, it just looks like it'd attract criminals from miles around, just to come and hang out on it and wait to mug you. Actually nobody was there except me, and I survived the experience just fine. The rusty chain-link cage around the thing just puts the idea in your mind, is all, and once it's there you can't shake it.

There's a compelling argument that pedestrian overpasses over roads are a sign of poor urban planning. The road was designed in such a way that it can't accommodate pedestrians safely, or at all. The overpasses are typically added to the construction plan solely to appease unhappy neighbors, and are built with a minimum of money and design effort, often ending up as scary eyesores.

I wonder if the "park" itself was another goodie thrown in to appease the neighbors? I suspect it went in around the same time as the overpass, along with Going St. in its current semi-freeway form. Perhaps Stanich fought against the plan, or for the overpass. The true story surely exists somewhere in dead tree format, but I don't know where to find it.

going_overpass2

This is Going St., looking west. No sidewalk on the south side of the street, and an unused trash-strewn one on the north. The road is this wide because it's the primary corridor connecting I-5 and the Swan Island industrial area. So you could make a reasonable counterpoint to the planning argument I just mentioned, and argue that the road is critical to the regional economy, and simply has to be laid out this way, regardless of any fuzzy-wuzzy aesthetic concerns. I dunno. I still think they could've done a better job with the bridge.

So why did I bother with the bridge in the first place? Check this out:

going_overpass3

For some unknown reason, the chain-link cage around the bridge has attracted a small colony of padlocks. Nobody knows who put them here, or why. Nobody knows how long they've been here, but it's obviously been a long time. And in all that time, nobody's come by to remove them. Is it someone's trophy collection, for all the locks they've picked, or bikes they've swiped, or something? Or is it Art, officially sanctioned or otherwise? It's all so mysterious...

Locks, Concord Ave. Overpass

Updated 5/1/07: This parks levy document from the city mentions something called Roy Beach Park, at Concord Ave. and Going Ct., which would be at the north end of the skybridge, across the bridge from Stanich Park. This seems to be the only mention in existence of this park, making it even more obscure than Stanich Park. Unlike Stanich Park, there isn't even a monument marking the spot. So although I was there briefly, I didn't realize it until a few minutes ago. Mysterious, indeed...

Updated: Said mysterious park is now run by the Water Bureau, which prefers to call it "Pittman Addition" for some reason. One would hope that Mr. Roy Beach isn't around to witness his name being yanked off the thing, at least. Unless maybe he turned out to be a really bad dude and the city decided to sweep the whole business under the rug as quietly as it could.

Friday, March 16, 2007

more wasted hours at the movies

If you number among this blog's nano-legion of longtime Gentle Reader(s), you may have occasionally, idly, wondered just how much time I waste on watching bad movies. Well, probably not, but let's suppose you did, purely for the sake of argument.

I've always had a thing for bad movies. As a kid, my two main sources for cinematic thrills were the late, lamented Aloha Theater, and afternoon movies on channel 12 (back when it was one of five total TV stations, the scrappy independent underdog against the 3 networks plus PBS). Stop-motion monsters? Great. Guys in rubber monster suits? Fantastic. Scripts that don't make any sense? Cool. Ridiculous dubbing? Yes, please, I'll have another.

I have a theory about bad movies, and about bad art in general. It may not be a very good theory, but it's mine. I'd suggest to you that if you want to understand what was going on in society at a given place and time, you'll learn more by studying that era's fourth-rate crap than you would by studying the timeless classics. First rate work reflects the artist and his or her unique vision, first and foremost. You can learn a lot about the artist, and that can be rewarding in its own way, of course. Fourth rate work generally doesn't proceed from someone's overarching, singular vision. Someone's churning out stuff they think will sell, in order to pay the rent and put booze, er, food on the table. In the "subsistence filmmaking" world, you can't afford to go too far out on a limb, or pander to too elite of an audience. To succeed, you figure out what the unwashed masses really want (whether they admit to it or not), and give it to them as best you can. The resulting work isn't an "objective" look at the society it came from, of course, but it can tell you something about the biases of the day, and how that society saw itself. Ok, so that's my theory, and it's not hard to come up with counterexamples. A prime virtue of both Dickens and Shakespeare is that they did say something about contemporary society. But then, they were both working out of economic need, and were only later recognized as geniuses. On the flip side, some bad art results from a singular but really cheesy vision. Ed Wood's Glen or Glenda is an extremely personal statement.


So here's the latest batch of B movies, for good or ill...
The Night Evelyn Came Out of the Grave

An Italian horror movie dubbed into English. I guess I don't really get Italian horror movies. Italy doesn't seem like a place where you'd get a lot of horror films; if you've got sunshine and wine and olives every day, why spend a single moment thinking about serial killers, or zombies, or cannibals? It doesn't make sense, but there you go. What I really don't get is that the film's serial killer turns out to be the "hero" of the film, in a late plot twist, and the baddies were out to lay their hands on his money. I suppose we can chalk this one up to Cultural Differences. The mod 60's cottage at the end is pretty cool, though. And although the film's supposed to be set in England, it's the least convincing imitation you'll ever see, which is sort of a hoot. I understand that the dubbed English version was seriously cut for US release, and I missed out on scads of luscious Euro-sleaze. Damn. I suppose there's no point in waiting around for the director's cut, is there?
Riders to the Stars

A very early SF film about a group of clean-cut white guys training for a flight into space. In the end, three are selected, and one survives, and I suppose you're supposed to draw some sort of "survival of the fittest" conclusion about who survives and who doesn't. I'm not sure. Also, there's the requisite love interest thing, and they live happily ever after, naturally. One interesting bit is that the omnipresent Richard Carlson is one of the guys who doesn't make it, having a legendary bad-movie freakout and trashing his spaceship in the process. Oh, and Carlson directed the film, too. Read into that whatever you like. There's a scene in the film where the ever-present icy female scientist automatically serves coffee to the menfolk. The movie generally strives for a sense of realism, and a prof back in college once told me this really was expected of you back in those days. You could get all the postgraduate degrees you liked, but when the ol' percolator started percolating, you were still nothing but a waitress until the boys had their caffeine fix. Ahh, the 50's, such a wholesome and innocent time. Feh.
Beast from Haunted Cave

This is an early Roger Corman effort. There's a gold heist in the beginning, and an icky spider monster at the end, and the rest of the movie is a whole lot of skiing. I think they were trying to cash in on the ski trend of the early 60's. I wasn't around back then, but I've seen my parents' home movies, and they look really similar to this film. Except without sound, and in color, with no spider-beast (in the surviving footage). It's kinda fun to see that snapshot of a bygone subculture, plus the creature holds its own. You don't see a lot of it, because it looks pretty crappy, but it captures people alive, traps them in spiderwebs, and feeds on them at its leisure, sort of like Alien, or Shelob in LOTR. That's way creepier than you'd usually see back in those days.
Them!

The prototypical giant ant movie. It's been a while since I watched this, so I can't comment in great detail like I should. But the large animatronic ants are just classic. And the grand finale in the L.A. sewers, near the Los Angeles River, are pretty great. TIght script, written pretty well, decent dialogue. It's just that everyone laughs because of the basic premise, I mean, giant ants? Jeez. That's crazy. But in the end, the movie exists because some moviemaker learned a little about radioactivity and went "oh, crap". So, ok, you can't really make ants grow to the size of elephants with a few gamma rays. But someone's heart was in the right place anyway. That ought to count for something.
Manos: The Hands of Fate

A lot of people call this the worst movie of all time, ranking up there with Plan 9 and Eegah! I think that's kind of unfair, really. The guy who made this was a fertilizer salesman in El Paso who decided he wanted to make a movie. He had a near-zero budget, zero experience, and he wrote, directed, and starred. Basically your classic indie filmmaker story, except a few decades too early, and with even less talent. The acting is about what you'd expect: The pool of top-rank acting talent in El Paso in the mid-60s seems to have been rather thin, and this movie didn't draw from that pool. We're talking high school play quality here. And making fun of Manos is like making fun of someone's high school play: It was a labor of love, they tried their absolute hardest, and even though they clearly knew next to nothing about their craft, they made up for it with a certain naive, earnest quality. It just isn't very nice to make fun of someone who's trying so hard, whether they succeed or not. Or to switch analogies, Manos is the movie equivalent of folk art, kind of like Grandma Moses, or a velvet Elvis, or the quilters down at the senior center. Again, making fun of it isn't very nice. Plus the guy cast himself as the remarkably clueless "hero" in a film with a decidedly downbeat ending, which ought to count for something. And that "Master" guy, with the robe with the gigantic red hands on it... That's an utterly awesome outfit. I think I may need a Manos robe for next Halloween. That would be the bomb, so long as you're around people who don't need you to explain it. If you have to explain the movie, you're sunk.
Monster a Go-Go

This baby makes a lot of "worst ever" lists. If you're a fan of that sort of thing, you may have heard of MaGG already. Otherwise, probably not. The key thing to know about this movie is that it's a splice job. Director A started movie B ("B movie", get it? Ha, ha.) but ran out of money part of the way through. Director C buys the footage, shoots a bit more of his own, and dumps the thing into the unsuspecting marketplace to make whatever cash he can. It turns out that may have been a good business decision, in the long term. If the original movie had been finished and released, it would've been just another unremarkable creature feature. But take two creature featurettes and awkwardly splice them together, and you've got box office gold. Eventually, anyway, once the ironic bad-movie nerds take notice. As splice jobs go, it's not the worst I've seen. Trail of the Pink Panther is way worse. You get a bit of Peter Sellers doing the usual Pink Panther thing, then he disappears (ok, dies in reality), and the rest of the movie is the world's most annoying female investigative reporter going around interviewing people about the "missing" Inspector Clouseau. Also, Horror of the Blood Monsters is pretty dire too, the usual Jerry Warren hatchet job. Although if you want a taste of vintage Philippine vampire cinema, this version's going to be a lot easier to find than an original film would be. Anyway, back to MaGG, the worst thing about the movie is the ending. It's like they wanted their saturday matinee audience to leave the theater angry, and go out and commit random juvenile offenses to blow off steam. I could say "Spoiler Alert" here, but c'mon, you really don't want to see this POS, do you? If you really don't want me to ruin the end for you, scroll down to the next movie, it's easy. There. Ok, so the good guys are chasing the monster (tall guy in bad makeup), it feels like we're at the climactic scene, the cops are in hot pursuit, etc. But then, the monster just disappears, never to be seen again. And the astronaut it supposedly mutated from is found alive and unharmed, thousands of miles away. So none of the movie's events ever happened, which is undoubtedly for the best. The End. Not very satisfying, is it? Kind of makes you want to go out and do some petty vandalism, doesn't it? Told you so. People usually talk about the bit where a phone rings, and you can hear a person making the ringing phone sound. It's funny, but I bet they just forgot to dub in the right sound later. There's enough awful crap in this movie (like the world's tiniest space capsule, for instance), so why bother taking cheap shots? Heck, there's a bit in Manos where they didn't quite get the clapper edited out at the beginning of the scene, if we're going to harp on bad editing. Besides, it happens so fast that you really can't savor the moment, and if you pause and rewind to see it again, your friends will call you a nerd.
13 Ghosts

One of the lesser-known works of William Castle, the theater gimmick guy. You've heard of him, the guy with the buzzers under the seats, inflatable skeletons, ushers running around the theater dressed as ghosts, that sort of thing. It doesn't hurt that his movies are fun on their own, apart from the gimmicks. Good, clean fun unfortunately, but fun nonetheless.
Monster that Challenged the World

A prehistoric creature hatches deep beneath California's Salton Sea, and sets out terrorizing the few people who live nearby. Can our heroes stop the beastie before it reaches the ocean? Because if it does, there's no stopping it. Present-day movies never present the hero as a grumpy, paunchy, clueless middle-aged guy. Male actors could get away with a lot more back then, I guess. So the movie as a whole isn't great, and the lead actor is the angriest old coot I've ever seen. And the title is laughable. But at least the outdoor settings are pretty creepy. I remember some years ago driving past the Salton Sea with a couple of other people. We knew it was nearby because of the smell, and it wasn't a great smell. Really the worst thing about the movie is the wimpy title. "Challenged"? Feh.
The Monster Walks

Bad gorilla-suit movie meets bad haunted house movie. It's been a while since I watched this, and there wasn't anything all that memorable in it. One ugly bit is that the token black cast member (a chauffeur, if I remember right) is credited as "Sleep-n-Eat". Not the as the character's name, the actor's name. Ugh.
Lost Jungle

This is a cinematic vehicle for one "Clyde Beatty", who I gather was quite the celebrity animal trainer back in the day. Sort of Siegfried & Roy put together, if they were both short sadistic little men with big bullwhips. It seems there was a whole series of Clyde Beatty movies at one time. Elvis, in his cinematic ouevre, would inevitably end up in a situation where he had to whip out his guitar and belt out a forgettable ballad or two. Beatty couldn't act any more than Elvis could, so he fell back on his strengths as well. Instead of crooning at adoring nuns or hula girls, Beatty would just whip the hell out of a lion or tiger or two. None of those wimpy "No animals were harmed in the making of this picture" notices for ol' Clyde. As far as I can tell, the audience loved it and kept coming back for more. And now that they're old, we call these people the "Greatest Generation". Ha. I only watched this because there's a cool 30's zeppelin in it, and all zeppelins are awesome. It's a law of nature, sort of. But it's only there for a short time, and it crashes, and then it's nothing but animal abuse until the credits roll. Yech.
Ghost Ship

Now this is a really, really good movie you've probably never heard of. It's another spooky, atmospheric Val Lewton movie, the same guy who brought us Cat People (the original), and I Walked with a Zombie. There aren't any ghosts here, actually. Nothing supernatural at all. Just a claustrophobic cargo ship with a sea captain who's warm, friendly, and homicidally insane. He's perfectly calm and reasonable as he explains it's his job to exercise power of life and death over every living thing on board. When he has to bump off a crewman, he comes across as rational and unapologetic. He's a tyrant at sea, but on land he folds up into a bitter, lost old man. And the ship puts to sea and he's a tyrant again. As with all Lewton movies, it's all in the details. The sound, and unforgettable visuals like the gigantic hook swinging madly around the deck during a storm, crewmen trying to dodge it.
Psyched by the 4d Witch

I tend to go easy on movies you see on "worst movies ever" lists, like Manos (above), or Plan 9. They really aren't the worst of the worst, not even close. For instance, take Psyched by the 4D Witch. Please. This is without a doubt one of the most godawful, incompetent, nonsensical movies I've ever seen, and that's saying a lot. I don't even know where to begin with this one. It's part groovy psychedelic drug movie, and part amateur softcore exploitation pic. So far so good. But it looks like it was filmed on silent Super 8 stock, and a soundtrack was added later: Inane narration, and music that alternates clumsily between classical (mostly Russian: Mussorgsky's Night on Bald Mountain, Tchaikovsky's 1812 and Marche Slave) and the groovy "4D Witch" song of the title. In a way it might not be fair of me to pass judgment on this lil' movie. Watching it without drugs (which I did, I'll have you know) may be like watching a 3D movie without 3D glasses. You just aren't properly equipped. But from my admittedly limited perspective I'd have to say this movie would be a sad waste of perfectly good LSD. You could also be contrarian and argue this movie is so incomprehensible it must, simply must be High Art. I could probably write that film school essay myself if I really wanted to, although it'd be total BS. I gather that it's only Art if the auteur actually intended the work to be messy or incomprehensible. Godard's Breathless is full of awkward jump cuts and people sitting around smoking and talking aimlessly, but it's definitely High Art. Everybody says so, so you can be sure it must be true. On the other hand, there are any number of Doris Wishman films that are superficially similar: Jump cuts, long conversations, plot that doesn't amount to much. But Wishman movies are dreck. Maybe there's a subtle difference, or maybe it's purely a matter of consensus. Who can say?